No one knows the true me inside
The little girl that I protect and hide
The one that silently cries each night
But each morning gets up ready to fight
I’m simply hanging by a thread
But no one seems to be able to see
I don’t know the woman in the mirror
That’s staring back at me
Going against too many things in life
That insult my heart my mind my soul
Always trying to keep the peace
Has me spinning out of control

Every morning that you wake up
You get to choose who you will be
For yesterday no longer matters
It’s now just a part of your history

To be better, to do better, to feel better
For no one else in this world but you
But William Shakespeare said it best
“To thine own self be true”

Every morning when you wake it’s another turn in this game
Will you set out for new opportunities or simply remain the same
Will you own up to your missteps or find another to take the blame
The beast inside in your own mind is the hardest one to tame

Please quiet the pain of my heart and my brain
The constant noisy bustle is driving me insane
I don’t know how to fix myself, or even how to understand
The constant state of confusion; for all that I am
I’m a mix mash mess up, I can’t seem to follow through
Seems I fuck up everything that I truly want to do.
Putting off, forgetting, getting sidetracked
I feel lost in a swirling maze with no way to get back,

I’m just me. I’m an observer by nature .. I notice everything (even tho I may not say anything .. I also notice its absence..). I overthink and feel everything deeply ..  I am a unique being in a copycat world .. and often misunderstood .. And for the first time in my life .. I can say I love who I am .. (and who I’m becoming) in spite of my missteps and imperfections .. Not perfect by any stretch of the imagination .. But perfect in my imperfections .. I choose not to fit in .. I’m just me.

Stop belittling people who think differently than you do
Those who choose to see life from a completely different view
Those who choose to think for themselves think outside the box
Who want open doors where the world has placed locks

“All in” to me means I’m a completely open book
Flip through my pages; come take a look
I’ve fought all my demons one by one by one
My skeletons and I now just dance and have fun
Not many have the strength tho, for that inner soul fight
But what you try to bury, will always come to light
It’s freeing to learn the very whole of your own soul
To find what makes you tick, and regain your self control

I always feel like an outsider
No matter where I seem to go
A stranger in a familiar place
That no one seems to really know

I exist within a bubble
That no one else can see
A life behind a grand facade
No one truly knows the depth of me

I’m not like anyone else I know
I must be from a different time and place
I want to be included and loved
But I want left alone in my own space

A contradiction of epic proportions
Describes the very core of my soul
But for the first time I understand
I only need me to make me whole

To have a matching soul to connect with
On every level in my soul, heart and mind
Would be finding a golden unicorn
In this world? An impossible epic find.

Envision that every disagreement/arguement/belittling comment (etc) is a brick. At first it’s something just thrown randomly .. so, you ignore it. A few more join it .. and it happens to trip ya every now and again. Without addressing those first few blocks .. it becomes a foundation for a wall of sorts. With open discussion it is possible to dismantle some of those bricks .. but if it is ignored.. if it continues .. that wall that has grown will surely divide you. Words matter. Are you building walls .. or dismantling them .. ?

Hello world!

Hello Ya’ll. My name is ‘Chelle Renee..I have been writing since 7th grade…my heart bleeds out its release in poetry..I hope that you enjoy these words and find something here to identify with. Please feel free to share with your friends as they may find something here for them as well. My dream is to one day have a book published, and this is merely a step toward that dream…May you have the courage to follow all of your dreams , no matter the fear or the obstacles..never let anyone or anything stop you in your pursuit for happiness…